Friday, 31 August 2018

Turkeys With Neck

Old Turkey had a turkey neck
it swang and swung at every peck
one day she said ‘my neck's a wreck
I'm off to see a plastic vet.’

The plastic vet said 'Heck, I gotcha
those folds and creases just don't suit ya
I'll snip 'em off, we're good to go
you bet this vet knows how to sew!'

A strangled cry, she nearly choked
When plastic vet drew up her throat
A slice off here and here he wrote
Till anaesthetic made her float

Old Turkey sure was slow to heal
the vet drip fed her corn and meal
but scars will hurt and leave a weal -
hey pain’s a big part of the deal!

Her dangly wattle taut and tamed
Old Turkey’s voice castrato-strained
a foul expression oddly pained
it costs a bunch to look so maimed.

WhenTurkey got back with the flock
the other old birds got a shock
her transformation sorely mocked
for all agreed the new neck sucked

They sang ‘our folds deserve less flack
and plastic vets should cut no slack
we’re proud of our old turkey neck
let’s sway and swing with every peck!’

© S.O. Fasrus

I worked for a plastic surgeon, but the feeling of guilt became too much

S.O. Fasrus: Social Justice Campaigner & Social Research Interviewer. Her verse and poems; some comic; satirical; and serious; can be found online. Recent poems are in New Verse News, Culture Matters, and Poems for Grenfell Tower.