Remember, Poetry24 welcomes submissions for both its main page and the In Brief... section. Poems inspired by news stories from the past will also be considered for publication in the occasional 'That Was the MUSE That Was' series.

Tuesday, 25 March 2014

shafted (feelin kinda fearful part 2)

-What the hell is that rap crap? Is that on the telly?- I walk in on my son who is spread out on
the floor with his face a foot from the screen.
-Some satellite channel I found accidentally-, he replies, changing over immediately.
-Don’t you have to finish your book report for tomorrow ?- I flick at but deliberately miss his miked-up ear.
-Yes-em-, he back-passes a Simpsons reference , - but I have to sort of find a life first, can’t face another Whinge In His Striped Pyjamas-.
So I tick off my twelve-year -old-and advise,
-Before you kick back,
being mindful of what you want for your Birthday, that it’s after ten,
pizza ready all of which I could eat myself, Goal of the Month coming up,
future social harmony at risk, fragrant teachers and stuff,
possible man-on-man peck at the school gate next week,
smiley face in lunchbox stuck to fluffy coconut cream-
He expertly races through the keys of the tv control, squeals past x factors culchie camper
pretty in pink denial for half a century, hears the oven bell call, catches my eye,
yums and rubs his belly, whines past News At Ten,  brakes at MOTD, nods me towards the kitchen.
So I check teams.
-How would you vote in a referendum? What if you had no vote?
What if you had two dads? Page-boyed track suited jeeped-up mum with weird checked apron ? Leg warmers for goalposts, not to mention the pharmacy bills and blunted razors-.
 -Yes-em!- He’s Cletus again from The Simpsons. -Dang, old timer! How twentieth century are you? My friend Blank Mc Blank’s Dad had a manicure on hols. Referendum is promised--So what-, I step on the ball, -there’s no referendums in the Bible. Only stones-.
-Really, haw haw-.
MOTD theme tune begins to boom in and I press him again, but he turns up the volume now,
suddenly impatient.
 -Daad!. Have a day off-, he blows up.
-My teacher says testosterone busted the country. She says boom boom my backside-.
-Come on now, boom out to the kitchen and get that pizza-, I threaten to substitute.
-Can’t-, he says. -Not old enough to cook. Have to finish that book report somehow written
fifty years late by an Irish man about a concentration camp-.
Jesus would have wept, but he’s surfing again.
QI tells us it’s illegal to wee in public, but not illegal to poo. Figure that one out, I kind of ole. But he’s in the jungle now.
A nineties celebrity ex model who looks a bit of a horse is eating a bit of a kangaroo.
So I go for feckin’ pizza myself .
As the door swings closed behind me the rap dude is back on.
Sometimes I think I would go back to The Rugrats on a loop.

Same sex marriage referendum will make Ireland 'a beacon of light'
Referendum on Same Sex Marriage to be held in 2015

©Noel Loftus
Noel Loftus is a member of ward9writers based in Mayo and enjoys very short bursts of inspiration tempered by long periods of work.

No comments:

Post a Comment