Dear Marcus, thank you for your note,
And good luck with that sinking boat.
I'd like to close this chapter now,
Before I'm brought to book somehow.
I do not wish to make a fuss
And so I shall be generous.
I'll happily give up my shares
In Barclays' various affairs.
You needn't give me office space;
I'll work beneath a bridge someplace.
And by the way, you can relax -
I won't force you to pay my tax.
But, given all that I could say,
I'm sure that you'll be glad to pay
No more or less than what is due:
Let's say a million or two.
Now, once you've settled up this bill
I'll take my hands from out the till,
And leave you, Marcus, to arrange
Some semblance of a culture change.
Spare not a thought for poor old me:
Ever your servant, Diamond, B.
© Philip Challinor
Ex-Barclays boss Bob Diamond under pressure to hand £2m payoff to charity
Weblog: The Curmudgeon - You'll come for the curses. You'll stay for the mudgeonry.
Books: Philip Challinor's Books